Hello friends! I've missed this blog. As with most infrequent bloggers I have found new energy for my little space in the big Internet world with the new year. With this second wind I've decided to expand my blog to include more of my life as I'm living it. Because that's what living in truth is all about - living! So in 2012 look for pictures, stories, misadventures and God's sweet lessons.
That being said there is no time like the present to get going! Last week I read this great article by Jen Schmidt. This brave woman wrote about the controversial topic of submission. Primarily the article was about encouraging women to submit to their husbands. But as I am figuring out submission isn't just for marriage it is for the here and now.
Let me be perfectly honest this was big news for me because I'm realizing more and more how much I loathe authority. I don't like it when people tell me what to do or when they call me out on my sin. I want to be my own authority and ultimately I want to rule my life and put each piece of it in its place to make a perfect picture. In my sin I only submit to authority when it benefits me. I'm comfortable here. Pushing submission to the back of mind.This is where the issue of submission has nicely stayed until Jen asked me the true million dollar question: "Am I truly going to submit my life to Christ?"
For me that question included submitting my:
- future marriage to acknowledge my husband as the leader
- words to only be up building
- family planning on if I will have kids and how many I will have
- time and how it is spent
- money and offerings
- image on how others perceive me
These are big topics. Some of them that I don't want to give up control of even to my God. But, through prayer and the word I am working through it. Every day I am amazed about how much lighter I feel about giving a little more of myself, my hopes, my dreams over to Christ. It's a scary process. With each one I'm saying "Are you sure you can handle this?" (Yes. I am that arrogant to ask God daily, my own creator, if He can handle something as small as my daily worries.)What I'm learning is submission isn't just an obedience issue. It's a faith issue. Literally I'm putting faith in God to have the final say in every decision in my life. Meaning it isn't my life anymore it is His. Instead of saying "can you handle it?" I'm saying "I completely trust you to do what is best even if I don't understand why." Submission gently carries away your selfishness and anxiety to the foundation of knowing you have put God in ultimate control of everything. Scary? Yes. Amazing? Double yes.
So here's the question: Are you going to submit?